Puppies Terrorize Nursing Home

Earlier today it was reported that a mob descended on a retirement facility and subjected it residents with several wagons full of baby dogs to spread disease and over-excitement to the seniors. A group calling itself People United to Prolong life, or P.U.P., have their spent time on money on one goal, to destroy the strictly regulated lives of the discarded elderly. P.U.P.’s converges on a suspecting retirement community with bright red pull wagons of puppies and lets loose these hounds of hell on Grandma and Grandpa. The inmates are forced to endure savage licks and forced belly rubs. It is unclear when this abuse to our elderly will cease.

Broken Ankle, Broken Rights

It looks as if Socialist France is attempting to deny the God given rights of one of America’s patriots by forcing free medial treatment at a Paris hospital. It all began as a second honeymoon for John and June Smith. They were celebrating their 10^th wedding anniversary in the city of love. But June fell on her way to the local Mc Donald’s for breakfast. Paramedics arrived and took her to the hospital where it was determined she had broken her ankle. After x-rays, bone setting, and medical treatment June was ready for release and requested her bill. When she was informed there was no charge for her medical treatment she became agitated and was quoted as saying “That’s what I pay insurance for. I want my bill”. When the hospital released her without a bill she stormed off with what some witnesses say, was a threat to go to the American Embassy. “They can’t just treat us like we got no rights. I’m an American and want to be treated that way. Just because they don’t do things the same here they should respect my right and let me pay my bill.”